Don’t be ashamed. Constant worrying will only hurt you and your baby. So, remain as calm as possible and try to keep your mind at ease throughout this process.  

First, think back to when you had your last period. Write down the day your period started. If you don’t keep track and are stuck, think about the following:  

  • Where were you when it started?  
  • Does anything about the day stick out to you?  
  • Who were you with?  
  • What were you doing?    

If you can determine when your period began, the following step is to figure out how long your menstrual cycle is:  

  • If your periods are irregular, estimating when you were the most fertile will be challenging. If they are regular, it will be easy. The average women’s cycle is 28 days. However, keep in mind your period could be anywhere from 21 to 35 days. Knowing the length of your cycle and when you started your period, will allow you to count 14 days after it began, and this is when you were fertile.  
  • For example, if your cycle is 28 days long, you are the most fertile on days 12, 13, and 14 of your cycle. It is in those days that your ovaries release an egg, and you’re able to conceive.   
  • The next step is to try to recall the people you had intercourse with when you were fertile. You could have become pregnant 3-4 days before you ovulated. If you can, make a list of the men you were with. One of the men on this list is the father of your child.    

At this point, whether you have an educated guess of who it could be, or your still not sure, don’t panic.  You may be able to get more clues as to when your child was conceived after you get your first ultrasound. Once you are 10-14 weeks pregnant, the ultrasound technician will offer you a dating scan. The dating scan is an accurate way of predicting your due date. Once you have a due date, you can count backward 38 weeks. This scan will tell you exactly when you ovulated. 

If you were with multiple partners in the span of a few days, you could still be unsure. The most important thing is not to stress yourself out. You won’t be left in the dark forever. Once your baby is born, a paternity test will give you answers once and for all. A paternity test is easy and quick; a quick swab of the inside of you, your baby, and the possible father’s cheeks, and the mystery is solved.