The moment you share the news that you are pregnant, people will often immediately feel the need to share all the pregnancy horror stories they know. “I have a friend who had really bad morning sickness the entire 9 months,” or “I was in labor for 32 hours,” or “my cousin’s friend was on her way to the hospital and got stuck in a traffic jam and had to delivery her son in the back seat of the car with the taxi driver helping!” And then when you begin showing, it seems to signal to the general public that it’s an open invitation for people to touch your growing belly.
Kristen says “during my first pregnancy, I couldn’t believe all the people who would just walk up to me and touch my bump and ask how far I was. People at the grocery store, at church, in line at post office just felt the need to rub my belly. During my second pregnancy, when I was out in public I was always on alert to watch for strangers with their hands out coming towards me. There were times when I wanted to wear a t-shirt that said ‘Yes, I’m pregnant but please keep your hands to yourself!’.”
TheBump.com has some hilarious stories of pregnant women’s bellies being touched by strangers.
The truth is, people aren’t really trying to invade your privacy. They just see your baby bump and out of excitement their hands gravitate to touching your belly. No matter their intentions, you probably want people, especially strangers grabbing your belly. So here are some suggestions to help during the times you just want to yell out “Stop Touching My Belly!”
Humor
Sometimes during really awkward situations, such as a stranger with their hands on your belly and talking to it, humor can help break the ice and snap the offender back to reality without sounding harsh.
Things like:
“You know a genie won’t pop out of there!” when someone is rubbing your belly
“If you get to touch my belly, what do I get to touch?”
“Sorry, the only person who gets to touch my bump is the person who put it in there.”
“That will cost you $5.”
“Would you like to touch by behind too, that’s also getting bigger now that I’m pregnant.”
“I don’t really think it was a crocodile that ate Captain Hook’s hand, I think he lost it after touching a pregnant woman’s bump without asking.”
“I’m not pregnant…actually I am but it’s not really polite to touch my stomach either way.”
Wear A Warning
Would you believe that there are actually lots of different tshirts out there to help tell people to keep their hands off?
Take the Hands off the Belly and No One Gets Hurt
Yes I’m Pregnant, No You Can’t Touch My Belly
Straight Forward Approach
- If someone asks you if they can touch your belly, first thank them for asking instead of just reaching out (this will help other mothers-to-be in the future) and then say “I prefer that you don’t.”
- If you can see someone coming toward your bump with their arms extended, use your body language to show it’s an unwelcome advance by placing your hands over your bump and take a step back followed by a “no thank you.”
- If you are too late and their hands are already on your bump responding with “I would have preferred that you asked first.” You can even take it a step further and then add “and if you would have I would have said no.” The person will most likely remove their hands and apologize.
Belly Touching is Illegal in PA
In Pennsylvania it’s not just taboo to touch a pregnant woman’s belly, it’s illegal. There was an old statue in the books making it illegal to touch a pregnant woman’s belly. It recently came to light when a woman filed a harassment suit against a man who continued the unwanted belly touch after being asked not to.
However You Do It, Let People Know to Please Stop Touching My Belly
While most women will not find it necessary to file charges, it is important to stand up for yourself when someone, especially a stranger, is touching your body without permission. Whether you use humor, a tshirt, or a straight forward approach, get your message across that you are glad people are happy and excited for you but that you prefer they keep their hands off the precious bump and please stop touching my belly.
